Mercurial Madness at the start of September

Great. Finally found a place. First day of Mercury Retrograde, the Department of Health came in and stamped LEAD everywhere. I haven't been writing on this blog lately because anything I say can and will be used against me. Does anyone have an idea why my keyboard is acting up as I type this?

This quick email I just sent to someone sums up the sitch:
I am sorry I haven't gotten back to you re FBN  Wanted
to let  you know I am working on it and will have something to show
this weekend.
Briefly, we got caught up in more lead issues--the girls' lead has
skyrocketed since their last blood test (I now know, this always
happens during the summer months) which prompted the health dept to
come and test our place and stamp LEAD everywhere. We had to convince
our previously "awesome" landlord not to kick us out then try to
convince him that he has no choice but to comply with the law
(something I am usu against doing).

With mercury retrograde (terrible communications), and soaring
temperatures, I have been trying to put out six fires for every five
that have started. Let me know your timeline (will do same, as we will
have to soon vacate temporarily) and hopefully I will be able to reach
a full stride on this shortly.

Best

I hope to look back on these posts in a year and shake my head and say, "I don't know how I did it." 

In a year, I hope not have been worn down by attrition but to have summoned my inner scorpio rising phoenix to uncover the most awesome resources available.

Death

Not gonna say a lot here. Have to go to Phila tomorrow nite to stay with my aunt while the lead abatement takes place. Reallllly inopportune time to have to leave. We ended up not getting the house we wanted a few blocks away. Owner didn't want freelancers even though we would have paid six month's rent upon moving. Today we saw...Ok I dont even want to get into it.

I did a tarot reading. Shouldn't have done that when my heart feels like it is going to beat out of my chest.
Nervous as hell.

My final card was the Death card. I pray that means this huge struggle will be over. Feeling like I'M gonna die. I am, of course worried for my child. I don't think I could make it without her. Maybe it's the two cups of caramel tea I drank a little while ago. We had to pack up a lot of crap so that the workers can get it done. Glad Nicolas will be here while they work.

Each day that goes by makes me wonder if it's a signal to finally leave New York. 

Running on Empty

Found lots of encouraging information to help my kiddie. In essence, she needs lots of vitamin B6 and magnesium. I have to get some blood work done, contact a few specialists and then we will be on our way.

In response to last night's griping, I went for a pseudo thera-run in Prospect Park this morning before all the nasty smoke from barbecuing commenced. I actually felt kind of silly holding my GIANT Sony CD Player. I might as well have been jogging with a giant bumblebee-colored plate. Of course, I accidentally popped in a TRANCE CD which is not at all conducive to keeping up a good pace on a searingly hot, humid morning.

Did I mention my other baby wakes me up all throughout the night and early morning so I never get to sleep more than 2.5 hours at a time? And I never get to sleep more than seven hours total? Did I mention that I am the type of person who needs nine hours of sleep a day?

I decided that it might be better to keep the first run in god-knows-how-long at a nice, meditative pace to match the music. Hopefully I will be able to move my legs tomorrow. Nothing cuts through a bout of depression and self-pity like sore limbs. One who is out of shape has to dispense excess energy on recovering from thirty minutes of light exercise for the next week and a half. Too tired and in physical pain to worry about nonsense.

As I have been considering my money-making options, I am now pulling together some factoids about the moon and turning that into a quiz which will be featured on Facebook. Not one to take Andrew Carnegie's advice to heart (keep working on one task and finish it before starting another), I have also decided to commence production on a flyer to announce my Broken Relationships workshop (more on that later). Finally, I am going to make a newsletter regarding one sign a month, analyzing it's features and pitfalls. It's going to be written in a funny, sarcastic tone but always with an upside to encourage personal development. We'll see how that works out.

Since the moon is now waning, I decided not to open a Paypal account (waning moon = money decreasing) yet. That will have to wait till I cast a spell on the New Moon (June 12).

Alright, I got less than an hour left in me, so I am going to try to find out more psychographic information on the LOHAS marketing segment.

Sorry I didn't put any links in the body text. I will save that task for a rainy day...

June and the Dehydrated Prune

Got my kid's evals in the mail today. Not good. The diagnosis, of course is that she is on the autistic spectrum. But worse than that, she is not functioning anywhere near the so-called normal range in IQ for her age. I am going to have to become an pseudo expert on yet another topic (or eight). This undertaking is my priority, however.

At this moment, I am pretty down because I really feel like we are not working on this together. Case in point, he's at a party for a 28 year old. What annoys me too, is that I spend all my time on the internet looking in vain for an apartment in a city where I don't want to live. He doesn't look for apartments but rather refers all leads to me. So I am looking for apartments, figuring out what to do for the kid, setting up all the appointments for the schools, doctors, specialists, etc., writing another fucking business plan, researching all the possibilities on how to change the outcome of her biochemistry (that's no walk in the park), taking care of the kids, trying to keep two rooms of the apartment livable, going to class (which is my only social outlet–haven't been to any kind of festivity since Melodie's art opening the day before my daughter's birthday), getting ready to build this business in which case I will go viral or go postal, and wondering if any miracles are being parceled out among the human population (certainly not in most parts of the world and certainly not in Louisianna/Gulf of Mexico), and if so, could I have one please?

Yet, I have always figured that to survive I have to do it on my terms. I want to get a job now, but I'll be damned if I can't seem to find one. So the stakes get higher, because it is now time for me to put my virtual money where my mouth is and start my astrology business. Officially, I will begin to teach astrology...

It's a boiling 80 something degrees at 11:30 at night. I hate muggy summer weather. The fan is drying my contact lenses out and I am constantly getting dehydrated. Conversely, my skin is constantly wet and oily. Speaking of which, I hope the soap I made the other night isn't caustic...

Alright, got my gripes out. It's time to move on. I will get through this by controlling the thoughts in my mind.

Mercurial Madness at the end of May (well beginning of Gemini June)

Tuesday, 12:12 am. I just downed Caramel Vanilla Lipton (two tea bags, as their pyramid shaped organza-like bags contain paltry amounts of leaves). Not long before, I polished off a Vitamin Water bottle full of refrigerated Free Trade coffee I made this morning. My back up plan was to go back to school (after all, all those ads on Facebook telling me Obama wants moms to go back to school must mean something, right?) to get a psych degree, probably in Child Psychology seeing how there's going to be an increased need (especially for those who are bilingual in French) for these professionals up until 2014, as I discovered from the Bureau of Labor Statistics.

Anyway, my mind has changed now since I am gathering up that much needed information on my target market. Writing papers, citing others who have parsed together boring bullshoot has never been my favorite pasttime (unlike what I am doing right here in this blog). I just want to do it already. What IT is, I don't know. After looking at my sister-in-law's website, I marvel at how much she has achieved in just five years. I know I need to get my ass moving (nothing to inspire an underachiever Capricorn like an overachieving Virgo). There's no turning my back on my astrological business.

Since my last post, I decided that my target market is iPhone Moms in the U.S., who are ages 25-50, income 45K to 100K, multi-tasking, connection-craving, and life-planning. I have no idea of what my USP (Unique Selling Proposition) will be, but one fact that glares at me from my computer screen is that the astrological sites and apps—birth data aside—are woefully un-interactive. I have learned that people become much more engaged with a brand (more marketing b.s.) when they actually have something to do! HA HA! Duh! I also learned that women in America, two years my senior spend more time social gaming than any other age group. HMMMM. Now I am not so ashamed for spending six hours a day playing Bejeweled. I gotta stop that so I can build this business and become bejeweled.

Currently, I am trying to tap into my mercury in aquarius and think of that next brilliant idea. Using my exalted mercury, dignified in the third house along with my sun of business creativity, I should be able to knock it out of the park after surveying my competition.

(I figure it's a good idea to balance the weak-point blog posts with some strong-point posts so I keep my chart descriptions in balance which = moon in Libra)

The whole child psych thing came up because my daughter had to wait so long to get her eval which finally happened this past Saturday. Now the battling for her really begins. I  freaked out tonight when I saw that she had made a small hole in the duct tape I used to cover the door frame (containing a layer of lead paint underneath). I still have confidence that her lead level will go down again during the next test, and her language capabilities will go up within a few weeks of therapy.

BTW, please pray that we find a place by June 15th.

Sixth house of Work and Health, I am leaving you behind for good. Oh wait, not the Health Part

It's time to put my inspiration to work... After pretty much scouring the availability of jobs, I have firmly decided that there is absolutely nothing available that I want to do. Maybe it's all in my head, but the concept of drudgery, stress and subordination to someone else's dream is not in the (tarot) cards or stars for me. I want to launch my venture but I am currently still lacking the expertise. So universe, lend me a hand, will ya? I am willing to do the work but I need the missing pieces of the puzzle to just miraculously appear before my very eyes.

Having said that, my sixth house sucks. Why? Because natal Saturn is in Aries which is at its weakest point. I hate taking orders, I hate having to act on someone else's stage, I have people who think they have control over others and I hate being told what to do if I didn't ask (but of course I don't have a problem dishing out advice). Aries is not into taking advice. Saturn is all about shoving advice down your gullet and if it's not taken, then you get punished and roughed up a bit by the authorities.  I am thankful for my great health (aside from a little sugar addiction). I don't mind following the rules if it's for my own proactive benefit and I get to call the shots.

So trying not to start and stop and stop and start, I am going to complete other projects I started doing within the next week.

1) I am trying to catch up on my business plan. Can I get caught up this Memorial Day weekend? Who knows?! Being that this is my third business plan in three years, I hope I get it right by now. UGH, it's hours of research. I don't know how I thought I could do this on my own. I secretly hope I didn't waste those countless hours of my life.

2) I still have to hone in on my target market for the Lunology app. Then I have to finish all the Lunology text. Then I have to refine the design and user interface.  Then I have the animation frustration.

3) I am going to decorate the envelopes of six new leads for Nicolas' gigs. Three have been completed.

I think I need to take my apple to the doctor before my protection plan is up.

Did I mention that I have to find a place to live and move?

fourth house crumbling

According to my marketing class this past Wednesday, we should be blogging every day. If not every day, why bother. I have a tendency to write too much, wait too long, then become inconsistent. So really, I am going to keep it short tonight.

I have been looking for an apartment since April. That's nothing in New York minutes, but it seems like a long time, especially when you consider that every day my kids are breathing death (we all are, but lead dust is just a bit more toxic, a bit more insidious, a wee bit more unsettling). Today we got kicked off the possibility list of an apt we almost had because I wrote the reason for leaving was due to lead poisoning. It turns out that the owner of the building got sued for the same thing recently and just couldn't think of that happening again. It was a large building two blocks from where I live now, up four flights of stairs. I guess it wasn't the one.

Taking my chances, I looked at another apartment that was in a private house. Four blocks from here. Perfectly nice block (all west indian–my hoe they moved to Brooklyn at the right time). The apartment was downstairs. Someone was supposed to meet me at five. My girls and I got there a few minutes before and waited until seventeen after. I took them around the block. Someone sitting on the porch of a lovely large home, smoking a sick cigarette started hollering and swearing up and down that I looked just like Joyce. She probably had just downed a glass of what I am drinking now (but not such a nice brand) and may have had a few hits of something else. This made me wonder why all these people have been able to do it and I haven't.

That's what frustrates me the most about NY. I mean do these people "deserve" what they have? I don't know. But what I do know is that I don't know how to do it.

We went back to the house and I forgot to mention the first time we went there, someone upstairs poked her head out and shook it no that she was not the owner but whomever it was that was supposed to meet me would be there in a few. Mind you that mysterious show person still wasn't there after our one block tour, so I decided to force the flimsy front door and of course it opened easily. I left the kids on the sidewalk since I decided to run in and out. To no one's surprise, my three year old started bawling, causing the only white couple in a two block radius to stop in concern until they saw me running back down the stairs.

The apt was a hodgepodge of crappy thin grey carpet, hardwood floors, and cheap linoleum squares. In desperate need of one of those home improvement reality show crews, just to get it rented, let alone sold, I now know why the house had a FOR RENT sign in the front window and $1450 monthly fee is usury.

I decided to really check the house out before bailing so I towed the girls up the front steps and my older one was still bawling. Looking at the rooms and kitchen led me to wonder if the seriously overblown price might have something to do with a backyard being part of the package. There was a key in the deadlock on the kitchen door, so what the hell, I turned it and walked down the precariously high steps to the backyard. Of course the Chumpette grabbed hold of a very splintery-looking slab of wood and started stirring it in a tub-looking container full of muddy water. For her, the next logical step would have been to put her hands in the same water and put that same hand in her mouth. All this was going on while I was distracted by the dead cat carcass on the ground right next to my feet. Masses of hair had fallen off the deceased beast and its bleached white bones were there, completely intact. The whole skeleton. Ah what a lovely image. But somehow, someone had a means of buying this house. Someone who seems completely illier illiterate and as completely aware that this place was just not going to cut it.
And some asshole didn't even bother showing up.

Now I said I would make this short, so I wouldn't put off coming back tomorrow. All this is to tell you that I really hate that damned venus (in its fall, very aggressive but bellicose) conjunct sad saturn (gloom and doom, fear) and moon in aries (quarrels and contention all over the place) in my progressed fourth house of foundation, home and family. However, the nice thing about aries is that they keep going (even if its like the tarot's infamous Fool).

Tootles. BTW, just leave me a comment if you read this. Maybe its better if you don't....

bemusement, not amusement

I haven't had the luxury of keeping up with these posts as I am pretty occupied with my intensive ten week course, "taking care of business." Taking this course has proven to me that my business knowledge and skills are remedial at best.

Of course I have been consumed with my current situation with my little one. For legal reasons I cannot recount what we have suffered at this time. I have been aware for several months that I have progressed venus and saturn conjunct in aries in my secondary progressed fourth house.  At the beginning of the year, I saw that there was more junk going on in my homelife to haunt me just enough to keep everything as interesting and stressful as possible (I have to look at my progressed chart again), but I  wondered how it would manifest. I knew it wouldn't be good, though, as Venus and Saturn are in their fall (at their weakest, ugliest, most trapped and debilitated). All that time, I just didn't want anyone to get hurt. Especially not someone who didn't deserve it.

Now I am faced with another set of complex issues that affect my little contraquarian for life. I can only say that I am very grateful to have certain metaphysical knowledge that renders me capable of concentrating my thoughts upon a desired goal and manifesting that thought into physical reality (which I need to turn up volume-wise in the finance department). Having said that, I know just as sure as I am here typing this right now—that any and all of my daughter's setbacks are only temporary and I will work on her and with her to obliterate any limitations that she might face as a result of this process.

When illness strikes, western medicine, like almost all other bastions of our declining civilization, has never been a trusted, favorite source for comfort or advice. I hesitate fully to force my child to get injected with some type of frankenstein concoction that may or may not do what they say it will.

Need time to think with my higher mind.
Need to tap into that vast body of wisdom and power which is so powerful and abundant within myself and the universe...
Need to pass this test with flying colors.

letter to jc

nice to hear 

perhaps you're still online.

so the blog tells what's up but I haven't kept up with it as much because I am now overwhelmed with a lot of paperwork and I work tomorrow (not looking forward and it's far too late to stay up but just answered a craigslist ad for part time work)

sidonie and noemie have lead poisoning so I am looking for a new apt which is not easy.

having said that, I have to get sido comprehensive testing by the ny dept of education since she doesn't speak yet and may have damage to the CNS or brain (which i don't think) 

yes I have spoken to a lawyer but I am waiting for the Housing Preservation Dept to do the lead test (since the first week of this month) to confirm the lead levels

sidonie has a level of 14 (ten and up is considered poison) and noemie is at 6.

so there you have it. they are both sleeping --- noemie is not sleep trained --- she still drinks lo lo at night a few times but it doesn't really bother. what bothers is the morning-- she needs a lot early in the am but still stays asleep. speaking of which, gotta go to sleep myself. I am stressed about tomorrow as I have a job to send to the printer and then business class from 6-9. 

Hope alls well. It's nicolas' birthday so he just got invited for a drink (and my taxes stuff is strewn across my bed, unfinished. I am going to copy this to my blog... talk soon? ) 

ps dreamt you were coming bk to NY...

March Madness

Hmmm. Ok, March has always been a terrible month for me. I don't know why. Something out of whack happens to me when the transiting Sun or Moon (the Luminaries) is in Pisces and sometimes in Aries. Lately it's been pretty much too painful to write this blog because of some very ugly presence in my fifth house.  (the fifth house is the first child) That son-of-bitch Uranus is messing with me through my child who has lead poisoning. It's level 14 which isn't terribly high but it's cause for some real concern. It's hard to tell if she doesn't speak yet because she has a learning disability (she also has mercury in Pisces), because she is bilingual or because she has been tripped up by lead. I noticed that she has had episodes of intense mania (which is also a Uranian trait) sometimes (especially on a sugar rush and no I don't pump the kid up with sugar–specifically it's happened after boxed organic juices or maybe too many wholegrain crackers and yes I know that these are simple carbohydrates). We will nip this in the bud, starting with nutrition. My kid seems to notice that I am going more easy on her since I now know that she is not intentionally going off the deep end all the time. I know she has eaten paint chips and the building we live in is one hundred years old.

I am waiting for the Department of Housing Preservation to come to do a lead test. After I get the results, I will elaborate on this blog.

Wouldn't you know that transiting bastard Neptune is in my natal fourth house of home which means that my freaking roots are all screwed up and up in the air and about to dissolve into thin air. The landlord told me he wanted us out and was ready to rip up our lease. At the moment, I have a kind of headache so I am gonna keep it short and leave it at that.

Oh, and I got an email from an open call interview I went to back in January (I think that was the only interview I ever went to where I didn't sit down because it was too short and impersonal. It was like speed dating but for an interview). I am so uncertain about jumping back into the workforce. I have just been beaten up (caused by myself of course) so much that I feel I could be damaged. But the fact of the matter is that I have two children. I have to pay a lot of fees to get this business going. Bottom line, I need an income. I am absolutely horrified that I might not have enough time and energy to do it all.
I am absolutely horrified. I need this job though. I really need to hang on to it just until I don't need it anymore. I absolutely need to nail it and not get the life sucked out of me and the wind knocked out of my sails. Gotta stay on track. Good news is that it's a Quark job. Good news is that it's the Learning Annex (I need to work for somewhere or something that I like). Bad news, I told her I could do web. I can do the most basic basics of web and that is a struggle. I need the job to be so easy for me that I don't even have to think. And finally, I have to practice having a healthy mental outlook so that I can combat any of the recurring problems that I might have faced in the past (I get that I will be tested over and over).

Forgive me for not proofreading but I have a lot of work to do and I am not exactly feeling peppy at 12:30 am.

Woah, this week flew by in a whirlwind. I have spent most of the week outside with my girls. I am going to keep this short so that I can get to bed before three a.m.

As I was going to write in the last entry, I have been overcoming some obstacles and checking off mini victories. I already mentioned the fact that I told my mother to never speak to me again. Other such victories to mention are as follows: 1) I attended the Seventh Annual Total Woman Conference free of charge since my business coach offered me the opportunity to do some prep work for the conference ahead of time. Last Thursday, I stuffed gift bags with another volunteer. This reminded me of how much I enjoy doing behind the scenes work preparing for events.

The conference was all about money. Money (and mother) has been the theme of March—woman's month. Boy have I been working on rewiring my brain about money. As saturn continues to sit on my natal moon, I continue to learn what I don't know about money. Interestingly, I am not in fear now. Like most people, I fear the unknown but this time I am excited by it. Having some information about money (or how the mainstream views it) enables me to better imagine myself having it. I really need it now as I want to take the sixty hour business course at CAMBA.

Having experienced a very moving moment from Joyce Moy, I cried as she recounted how her mother and baby brother were sitting on a couch on the street, having been evicted before she got home from school. She emphasized that MONEY IS A TOOL. That statement made all the sense in the world to me. I like tools. I like to use tools to make my life easier. The key phrase for Capricorn is I USE.

During the conference, I got a chance to do exercises to undo some of the feelings of discomfort I feel when imagining myself with large amounts of money.

I learned many new things, got reinforcement for some things I already knew and unlearned some of what I no longer need on this journey.

2) I got matched with a lawyer from the call I put in to Legal Aid. I am reading the Letter of Engagement carefully as the second paragraph warns me to do. I am relieved that I am getting help pro bono and will be sure not to incur any unnecessary costs (which means I will not incur ANY costs).

3) It turns out that the banksters who are suing me are in a world of trouble of their own. Higher ups are in jail for drug smuggling, fraud, embezzlement and just about every other crime you can imagine.
The clerk told me that I have noting to worry about even though I am representing myself.

Yesterday, I listened to a webinar by Barbara Bellissimo called How to Ask for Money. I can't say that I was swept off my feet from the webinar or laser coaching (or the coachee, for that matter). I did, however, download The Ten Biggest Fears Women Have (I have all ten of them) and How to Overcome Them so this is what I am going to read before going to bed.

PS So much for keeping it short, but at least I am keepin' it real...

I have been MIA a lot this month as March Madness continues. Minor little victories is the name of the game for me this month. So far, I told my mother to never talk to me or my family again after that seventeen paged single spaced letterbomb she sent. This is an outcome that has been thirty years in the making.

Oh great, I just accidentally lost a half hour's worth of writing I put here, having edited it in the wrong format. Since Daylight's Savings (Losings) Time has already robbed me of an extra hour's sleep for the past three days, I have to go to bed an hour earlier and can't rewrite my commentary at this time. Now my baby is waking up too so it looks like this has to wait...

It's been a minute since I have last written. They always tell you to succeed in something you have to believe in yourself. They always say that you can do anything you put your mind to. They say that you can change your life and achieve great things by deciding what you want to do and taking action toward achieving your dreams. All the pep talk serves a purpose. We need it. We need the affirmations because our environment reflects what we feel and think about ourselves internally. We need to put positive thoughts and feelings in our minds in order to make positive things happen. But what they don't tell us is that when we decide to change our lives and put ourselves on a new path, all kinds of other things happen to stop the progress. That brings me to the art of understanding the astrological chart as usual. Generally speaking, we all have planets in our chart that have a job to do. Some planets work with others and some work alone. Some act as benefic agents, helping us grown and buoy challenges and stresses while others self sabotage. Some planets wield a lot of power and some are relatively weak. Specifically, I have a group of three planets in the same sign (Libra) very tightly knit. They work together ALL the time. One planet never does anything without the other two. They are in essence, the Three Musketeers. It just so happens that these planets are the Moon—representing my subconscious, my emotional needs and security, my instincts, my mother and my habits, Uranus—the planet of rebellion, upheaval, genius, insanity, sudden shocks and sudden changes. These two planets are in exact conjunction (meaning the same sign with the same degree--and there are thirty degrees in each sign) paired with Jupiter the planet of expansion, of the higher mind, luck, entertainment, over-doing it, my broadview with the outerworld and my well-spring of wisdom. Let's see now, in addition to having to go to court (this would be about finances and Jupiter rules my second house of finances), I got a seventeen paged, single-spaced, type letter of hatred and anger splattered in between mostly Old-Testament, Hell-Fire and Brimstone Style Biblical verses. This lovely letter came from my mother (did I mention the moon rules mother?) and all this chaos (that lovely loose-canon, Uranus) is going to finally either kill me or set me free (which option do you think will be my final outcome?!). More later, have to do some martian activity (exercise) and get the baby some air.

Neptune, the god who calleth those things that be not as though they were

Dear Reader,

(Reader is singular because I probably have only one reader, but to you I am grateful and i hope you conclude this post with a sense of inspiration).

Thank you for coming here to find out what I have to say today (it's after midnight and I just swigged my homemade brew of Starbucks coffee a little over three quarters of an hour ago). I pondered the topic for this edition of the Art of the Chart all day. 

I will attempt to keep this post short just because I have a bit of graphic design work to do before my brain comes to a screeching halt for the night (day).

So I have to write about Neptune again because it is such an indescribable planet. Of course now that I try to channel Neptune, I have no attention span (while watching 
Project Runway All Stars Challenge 2009 next to this screen.

Neptune doesn't get as much power credit as some of the other planets. Take the Sun. The Sun is where you shine. Mars. Mars is action, raw energy, sex drive, vitality. Even Saturn. Saturn scares you and kicks your ass  your whole life then Father Time says your time is up and you die. Yes, Saturn is a mother2^#! I mentioned Neptune's the generic influences in my February 17th blog.


But inspiration and imagination are two powerful forces. Since everything begins with a thought, the imagination allows us to visualize where we would like to go if we are not already there. Almost everything (manmade) around us first existed as a figment of someone's imagination before it materialized. How could we use the internet if someone didn't have the imagination to visualize and materialize something invisible? How did someone figure out that people's computers could talk to each other through some weird concept known as cyberspace? This imagination of the human mind includes all things good and bad. What is this concept called "mind," anyway? The word "mind" doesn't exist in German and probably many other languages (in French the word is "esprit," which is also the word for "spirit").

I have a lot of imagining to do right now as things in my life have to change drastically. Neptune gives relief when things get tough. I am currently experiencing an opportunity to tell my mind that my life is on a completely different level from where it actually is at this moment. Specifically, I am being sued by a credit card company and I need to go to court and deal with it (I can't pay it). But I am scared. I have been in court before under much more dire circumstances at a much younger age, so I can do this. 

Using mental pictures and associating powerful positive emotions will help me maintain the faith and strength to manifest my dreams. I absolutely must achieve my goals so that my children know that they can achieve theirs, too. I have multiple law issues to deal with, coming under the ruling of Venus and Saturn. This Friday, Venus day, I must deal with some legal issues and talk to my (hopefully) first mentor. I truly believe in my heart of hearts that I will be able to overcome anything because I will be able to surround myself with people who will help and believe in me to steer me on the right path.

astrologyblog

Today I went to a great class called Marketing Like A Pro at CAMBA, less than a ten minute walk from my apartment. I had NO idea that CAMBA had 55 locations in Brooklyn and a $70,000,000 annual budget. This was one of the best classes I have ever attended, anywhere, period. Before arriving, I didn't know what to expect. The title of the course itself seemed a little cheesy but I really feel like the class lived up to its name. And it was FREE. Only in New York. We really do have the best and worst of everything here. This free class was a better deal than an MBA Marketing class at Harvard (not dissing Harvard, but free is a better deal by default). The instructor started off by asking us what we wanted to cover in the course. We had thirteen points on the board—they were all covered in detail and I learned more about marketing in those two and a half hours than I have learned in my entire lifetime.

The first day I started this blog, I mentioned that I was working on the marketing section in my business plan. I have been gathering information but haven't been able to visualize the structure needed to execute the plan, nevermind convey it on paper. But now I can do it. And I am scared. The world of possibilities continues to reveal itself to me each day. And for that, I am grateful. Feeling like I am finally headed where I need to go, I vacillate between elation, excitement and tears of joy/fatigue, and being frightened (how the hell am I going to get this done?). I realized after taking this class that I have to go back to the drawing board and revisit my target market demographics.

The planet Mercury rules over Wednesday (in French, Wednesday is mercredi). Mercury rules Virgo and Gemini. I met a Virgo wedding planner who I think I can work with and vice versa (more on this later). Use Wednesdays and mercury hours for learning, research, and transferring information. Fait accompli.

Finally, on this day (well, now it's technically yesterday) I went downtown and taped up a couple of flyers around the area where I lost my camera. I hope the police don't call me (yes, I printed my phone number) tomorrow morning saying that I committed a federal offense by posting flyers on private property ( a subway entrance, a telephone booth). I was desperate to do something to alleviate my grief. If I go to jail, at least I will have a lot of time to plan. Siiiigggh.

Ugh. Neptune, you swampy water god

I am heartbroken. Saturday was my toddler's third birthday so we went to a Family Art Making Day at BRIC—a Brooklyn gallery. I took a grand total of three pictures and remember putting the camera back into its carrying case before returning it to my backpack. After we left, someone tapped me on the back saying my bag was open and of course the camera fell out but I didn't realize this until today. Priceless pictures gone forever. Losing things has always been a past time of mine.
Neptune in the first house makes be prone to daydreaming, confusion, forgetfulness and disorganization. The positive traits I get from this placement include daydreaming, escapism (speaking of which, I sure could use a drink right about now*), imagination, mystical tendencies, ability to tune into psychic energy, artistic and musical ability. I am kind of too upset to write now. I cried a little because I felt a loss for the pictures of my kids. The only way I felt a little better after posting a lost ad on craigslist and seeing that I am not the only one who has recently lost something of value. Someone actually posted that they found an envelope with a thousand dollars in it!  My belief in humanity has been temporarily been restored but I am still aching in the heart area. My husband bought that camera for me to photograph our baby. Sighhhhh.

OK so I really need to just post this. Remember how yesterday I mentioned I have trouble sustaining my energy levels? I got a chance to listen to February 9th's edition of James' Martinez's show with Richard Bandler who helps severely mentally ill or phobic people get rid of psychological problems really quickly (I need to see him myself!). For over forty years, Bandler has studied the techniques used by successful people and how they control their thought patterns and how they harness their behaviors in order to be successful. Interestingly, he mentions that the people who are finishers become MORE motivated as they get closer to their finished results and they don't wait till the last minute to do things (hmm, the opposite of my usual tactics).

I am going to force the more evolved side of Neptune to prevail at the moment so, it's better if I work on my moon app art now. Maybe I will design a flyer to hang up around downtown.

Going to a free business seminar tomorrow. I hope it inspires...

* I chose to finish my broccoli soup with a dash of port in it and drink a cup of British Blend Tetley tea instead.

New Moon, Retro Mars

Ugh, too much time has passed since I have written. A week goes by in the blink of an eye. This motherhood, work-at-home-mom thing is impossible. Men just don't understand. The two of us are here all the time (my husband and I) but it's still me who is on call 24/7. I am not complaining (well, maybe a little bit) but truthfully, my time management skills have always left much to be desired.

This past week has been one adventure in mother hell. The other night, my toddler was on the potty and my baby was around the potty. For some reason, the baby enjoys knocking down the potty cover while my toddler sits on it (and draws for hours) and basically quietly heckles my overdue potty trained daughter. I stepped out of the room to look through some sketch books for blank pages for busy-time drawings. No more than two minutes passed before I got back to the children—my baby had brown smeared all around her mouth and her hands. A tiny brown hand print was (wet) plastered on my older daughter's white (it was a gift!) sweater. I screamed bloody murder as my baby had literally eaten sh*$!@. Typical! My toddler might has well been whistling dixie. She just sat there as though her baby sister's sampling her second hand foodwares was no different from her eating Gerber.

As much as all of these incidents go on in life, I have to stay focused on what I am supposed to do. How can I remain focused? I just try to remember what my Sun is about. Achievement. That fable
The Tortoise and the Hare didn't get lost on me as a wee one. Not surprisingly, I feel like this time, if I can hammer away a little each day, time (good ol' Saturn) will definitely be on my side and I can really accomplish this.

Today the Moon is in Pisces. I tend to have very low energy and feel a bit blaaahhh when the Moon is in this sign--even more so than when it's in Cancer which is supposed to be sort of ugly for Capricorns. Capricorns don't generally like to tune into the moon energy (or at least this one doesn't). It's too moody and unpredictable for me. I like the intuition and all that, but I just don't like being all erratic and affected by stuff. A case in point is that I missed the New Moon again. This is bad because I need to do some money spells. I also forgot that it is Chinese New Year of the Tiger (I have to look that one up). The New Moon in Aquarius has definitely brought some far out hopes and wishes to the forefront. But now it's imperative to harness the Mars Retrograde in Leo energy so as not to burn out my enthusiasm and let the dreams fade away. I have super weak fire (a little debilitated Saturn in Aries, oy vey) in my chart so my stamina really is about slow and steady wins the race. I think this fixed nature of Leo will help me to really push my career along (it's placement is in my tenth house of career. When it goes direct in early March, I hope to have my first app done).

I wanted to just make everyone aware if you are trying to put together a marketing plan, check out this Facebook link and make this machine work for your whatever you're trying to do. There's so much information on this site that I am still sifting through. The potential here is incredible! Exciting!

Plutonium

Wow, it actually feels weird to miss a day. I had tonight's blog all planned out in my head. I was going to write about the Sun in our charts and how the Sun sign is our "get-out-of-jail" card. But that topic will have to wait till another time because I feel the need to bring another issue to your attention.

I've been listening to radio (on i-Tunes. I listen to an astrological/
numerological radio show entirely in French by an elderly gal called "Granny" and the jazz station WKCR), and James Martinez's podcasts these days. I am so glad that my conscious mind takes me away from the garbage being spouted on regular radio (including the music) and has led me to being able to stay informed by another type of reality that is more aligned with my natural state of existence. If any of you out there are struggling with financial problems, it is important to know that a great engineered financial crisis is being planned by the (unseen) Powers that Be. There is a lot of information available on this and it's beyond the scope of this blog but for those of us who are not where we want to be in life at this time, it behooves us to learn how to de- and reprogram ourselves immediately.

James Martinez has a spot on Achieveradio which I heavily endorse for those in need of financial and spiritual realignment (I am raising my hand on that one). I only just now got a chance to listen to Thursday, February 4th's podcast. He included a part of a speech given by Texas Congressman Ron Paul. Now I am not particularly fond of the politics that come out of the State of Texas, nor am I a fan of most Republicans (and for those of you who are, that's fine. I am not a Democrat, either and that topic is also for another day) but I do think he is at least tries to warn the masses about where we're headed. Please listen to the  radio show for details, but basically Ron Paul shows us how the Pluto in Capricorn situation is unfolding.

In a nutshell (or a bullet shell is a more appropriate metaphor), the people behind the scenes are trying to take advantage of this crumbling infrastructure to crack down on our civil liberties and our so-called freedom in the name of our security. I have news for you—any time someone tries to take away any of your liberties or freedom, it is NEVER for your own security. Don't fall for that. The naked body scanners in airports all over the world are NOT there for your security. A scan of every person who passes through them will have a digital image stored in a satellite that will be used for the purpose of tracking us. No, you won't see this on CNN or Fox News but people like James will tell you the truth because—let's say if they really are trying to imprison us—we can use the truth to set us free.

This is really how we need to survive Pluto in Capricorn. Pluto exposes the truth under a huge pile of rubble.  Despite its demotion from being considered a planet, Pluto shows us in our chart what and where we have to survive. The Plutonian (read plutonium) energy will blow everything in its path to kingdom come. Pluto is transiting somewhere in your chart right now and that is where you will feel him for better or for worse. Pluto will be visiting my communication sector till around 2024 so I am doing my part to tell you how it's really going down.

Luckily (and unluckily), I am very familiar with survival and the plutonian energy since this planet both rules my chart and is one of my dispositors (in layman's terms, Pluto kicks my ass all the time). As you all know, I am a Capricorn too. Simply put, this means that Big Business and Big Brother are going DOWN and they are going to try to take us with them. What they don't want you to know is that you have control over your own thoughts and actions (if you chose to) and don't have to go out like that.

Hopefully you will familiarize yourself to some of the people I mention in this blog so that you can begin to get ready for whatever life or God or your stars has in store for you. It's time to train because we are going to need a lot of endurance.

Easy like Sunday morning, not Sunday, Bloody Sunday

Keeping true to my word, I wrote an audacious letter to my prospective mentor yesterday. I started off said letter by stating that I had originally wanted to choose Anita Roddick but since she has been dead for a couple of years, the person I addressed the letter to was my next choice. I didn't send it yet since I want to format it flawlessly and stamp my logo on it. I didn't mention my project(s) directly, just some important common points we have. I will send it tomorrow, Sunday because Sunday is a great day for looking good (it's a day to SHINE, whether you are a sweaty preacher in a pulpit or a Sunday painter showing watercolors at a gallery opening...).

Just a side note--I used to DREAD Sundays. When I was young, I always lived with people who spent the entire Sunday attending church. This includes my extended family of aunts when I lived in Wichita, Kansas (New Covenant), three foster homes (The Goddards in Asbury Park, NJ, Reverend Gerald Cobb in Freehold, NJ and the late driving to New York City to see Reverend "Ike"* with Sue Williams) and finally, my father in Los Angeles (I religiously attended one of the three Sunday services at Crenshaw Christian Center*). Depending on who I was living with or where I was, I would sometimes go to worship services two or three times in a day. What I hated most was having to get up at 6 am. What I hated second most was my hair. No matter what the circumstances, let's just say, I wouldn't have wanted to go to heaven on any of those given Sundays and  have to spend the rest of eternity with my hair like that.

Looking back I am grateful for having had some form of faith to lean on. Though it isn't what I believe now (not literally anyway), I know I got a lot out of those Sundays. If you still don't think Sunday is a day to shine, go to any black church in the US and look at the sistahs dressed in their Sunday best complete with hats I bet you didn't know they made anymore. Ordinary people shining with all their might as they sing praises to the Lord. Preachers getting hearty hallelujas and praise Jeeee-sus with spatterings of AAAY-MAN! All very theatrical. The Sun rules Leo, which among other things, rules the theatre...People getting filled with the Holy Ghost and going into a sort of trance dance that undoubtedly comes from the dances rooted in African ceremonies. Someone getting up and spontaneously speaking in tongues, or glossolalia. Now that's the power of the SUN.

Much later,  I loathed Sundays in a much different way. I had countless daymares and nightmares, fearing what unspeakable doom would await me on Mondays at work. Inevitably, Monday brought the usual generically genial and benign "how was your weekend?", " good but too short" call and response script,  followed shortly by the dreaded cycle of waiting for the weekend all over again. How depressing. For me, this was the most certain and painful way to die an slow, hellish death. For anyone going through this, something CAN be done. If you are at a loss on where to begin change, look to your chart (or horoscope). The answer can be found by examining your SUN!

Between Venus and Jupiter

Hi From the Depths of Cyberhell. Still plugging away on this marketing thing. I have to say that I am extremely excited, even though I feel so far away from my goals. Can I just have one goal, please? Here we are, Venus hour, hour of socializing. Luxurious, lovely leisure-seeking, lusty Venus rules Friday. Why do we love Fridays? One reason I can think of is that those of us who are in the working world (not me) look forward to the hour on the clock when we are free for the weekend. Thank God it's Friday represents a chance to engage in leisure—Venus loves to kick up her heels and chill—go out for a drink (or several), hang out, take the paycheck and shop (Venus rules money and shopping--especially luxury). It's also a good day to ask for favors (so if you are looking to ask for a raise, you know which day to ask), settle quarrels, start investing and make improvements to appearances. 


I had a packed day as usual, but managed to do a bit more research on my prospective mentor (I watched a video of a speech that this prospective mentor gave on Youtube and I have to admit I was a little bit intimidated because this person has a razor sharp wit and I tend to spar with people with this type. But when I am asking for a huge favor, maybe not such a good idea. I left a message on this CEO's assistant's machine yesterday, introducing myself as an alumna of the same undergraduate college seeking mentorship. She called me back within thirty minutes and said she was already booking for August.


I have to meditate on which approach to take for my mentorship letter. Business-like bullshit? Or should I use Capricorn candor and tell it how it is? Although my sun sign is Capricorn, my mercury resides in Aquarius. This means I communicate and process information in an Aquarian manner (read: there's a fine line between genius and insanity). This means I have a tendency to lean toward eccentric or unexpected. I am unable to genuinely say what I think people want to hear—I have to speak the truth as how I perceive it. A few years ago, I asked potential employers their astrological signs and told them that I had to know if I was able to tolerate working for them based on their signs—I got the job.


Refusing to toe the line has gotten me into trouble my whole life but today I must present myself as how I really am, weaknesses and all. Today I am going to muster up the courage to ask someone for help. 

February the First, Part Deux

Welcome my blog Art of the Chart, although I originally wanted the title to be: The Art of Changing Crisis into Opportunity: Or How to Really Start a Business with Literally No Money. Too long. As the current title suggests, I will to show you how I use astrology of my horoscope and the horoscope of the day of the week to change my life. I hope to inspire you to do the same.


I know I called the first posting February the First but it was uploaded yesterday, the second. That's because I must brush up on my very rusty HTML skills and I am currently surfing the crest of a new learning curve. On Monday, I wrote a great deal more than I posted, so I would like to catch up by posting some of the highlights over the next few days with changes (Monday is ruled by the Moon which changes like the tides of the ocean) (the Moon rules the ocean and tides—astronomically verifiable phenomenon) :


This blog will help keep me on track and I hope it will help others who are in similar situations. I am a mother of two girls--ages three as of February 13th and eight months. With no regular income and no nanny, time and money constraints force me to distill The Business down to the bare essentials and keep my nose to the grindstone every single day.


My day requires constant prioritization and re-prioritization of immediate to-do lists. A typical day might look like this:

1. Upload this blog entry (after tweaking)
2. Upload a picture or two
3. Flesh out the marketing section of my business plan
4. Send said plan to business coach, the wonderful
   Elisa Balabram
5. Sketch designs for iPhone apps
6. Start laying out User Interface screens for apps
7. Design tee shirts to be sold on Café Press or similar tee shirt vendor site
8. Write introduction to prospective mentor
9. Take children to park after naps
10. Cook dinner
11. Stay up till three am to do more of 3-8

Doesn't thist list seem a bit unrealistic? I might be able to do two of the non-child related tasks today if I am lucky. But which ones do I choose? (I have Moon in Libra, so making decisions can be challenging for me sometimes) Which priority is most likely to go quickest and most smoothly if I do it at the right time?


Today Wednesday, so I know that this day is ruled by Mercury—the planet of communication of all types. If I can focus on the list items that involve communication, starting with number one, working my way down the list, I will have accomplished something by three a.m.


Well, it looks like number nine has moved to the top of the list so I will be back later...

February the First

We the unwilling led by the unknowing have been doing the unthinkable for so long with so little, we now attempt the impossible with nothing.” ——Anonymous

BILL E. GOTE represents the zodiac sign Capricorn—the billy goat with the fish's tail. The cookbook description for Capricorn goes something like this: Capricorn lives by his life-long ambition to reach the top of the mountain. He will bide his time, surviving by eating tin cans or in the case of Three Billy Goats Gruff using his ingenuity, wit or creativity because he has little else at the outset of his voyage. Armed with maddening patience, rock-solid perseverence, practicality, and painstaking effort, he eventually achieves his goals when others have long since given up the ghost (Capricorns, along with Sagittarians tend to live longer than other
signs). Of course there is more to this story but we will get there in due time.

For now, I invite you to accompany me on this journey to creating an astrological lifestyle company started from little more than ingenuity (free), inspiration (free), insight and innovation (mostly free).

I want to share all the cheap and free ways I find to get this business off the ground, as well as the information that will help get things done by using the astrological forecast to guide us to our destinations (destinies).

If I can build this business and I will, you will know that you can do whatever it is you set out to do, too. Most importantly, we can inspire others to create value with their lives and be the change we want to see (be).